i hate goodbyes

I don't know why i stopped writing blog posts. I got too busy and lost time. But more than that I think I just lost the motivation to write. So I shall try to go back to my old habit and write again. I can't believe that the last post was over a year ago.

It's 2012. One month into it to be exact. January was such a blur that one could almost say, "time flies." It's quite ironic that the last post I had here I posted a video for a friend who left. Because just like that song almost 2 years ago, I feel exactly the same thing today. Last week my friend Bala passed away. It was all so sudden. One moment he was there and the next moment he was just gone. And since last week I've been grieving silently, honoring my friend with little snippets of posts in Facebook here and there. But I thought I'd write about him today. Bala was my second friend in Malaysia. He was introduced to me by Marissa who I met in one of those expat forums in KL. We met for the first time outside university LRT station. He picked up so I could join their badminton game in PJ. Marissa could pick me as she had work. I was a bit wary when I first met him. He looked like a wrestler more than a badminton player. But he was such a sweetie that i immediately knew he was like a teddy bear. Big and cuddly. Scary but actually sweet. Through the years Bala showed me true malaysian hospitality. He hosted parties for us, He always checked on me when I wasn't around for badminton. He made sure I was okay when things got a bit rough for me in KL. In short he was a great friend. He and his wife Natasha helped make KL home for me.

Until last night I thought I was okay with Bala's death. The truth is Im not. Saying goodbye too soon to a friend has left a big hole in my heart. And now my heart is broken. And it will be for a while.

I hope to be okay soon. I hope.