Monday, January 30, 2012

i hate goodbyes

I don't know why i stopped writing blog posts. I got too busy and lost time. But more than that I think I just lost the motivation to write. So I shall try to go back to my old habit and write again. I can't believe that the last post was over a year ago.

It's 2012. One month into it to be exact. January was such a blur that one could almost say, "time flies." It's quite ironic that the last post I had here I posted a video for a friend who left. Because just like that song almost 2 years ago, I feel exactly the same thing today. Last week my friend Bala passed away. It was all so sudden. One moment he was there and the next moment he was just gone. And since last week I've been grieving silently, honoring my friend with little snippets of posts in Facebook here and there. But I thought I'd write about him today. Bala was my second friend in Malaysia. He was introduced to me by Marissa who I met in one of those expat forums in KL. We met for the first time outside university LRT station. He picked up so I could join their badminton game in PJ. Marissa could pick me as she had work. I was a bit wary when I first met him. He looked like a wrestler more than a badminton player. But he was such a sweetie that i immediately knew he was like a teddy bear. Big and cuddly. Scary but actually sweet. Through the years Bala showed me true malaysian hospitality. He hosted parties for us, He always checked on me when I wasn't around for badminton. He made sure I was okay when things got a bit rough for me in KL. In short he was a great friend. He and his wife Natasha helped make KL home for me.

Until last night I thought I was okay with Bala's death. The truth is Im not. Saying goodbye too soon to a friend has left a big hole in my heart. And now my heart is broken. And it will be for a while.

I hope to be okay soon. I hope.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

I understand your pain, and am so very sorry that you are having to bear this burden. I lost my very best friend March 23, 2008. I still have memories. Just today I was taking on a challenge, and began to giggle, because I knew that Sandee would be shaking her head watching me struggle with this project. I called a mutual friend and told her about this, she giggled as well. I say this because I am in hopes that in time, you will be able to have the same kind of experiences.
What led me to this blog for the first time today was I was looking up the poem, "After Awhile". Everything happens for a reason, including me happening on this blog for first time, seeking out this wonderful poem. I'm in hopes this will give you comfort.

Flights Of The Mind said...

Hello Stranger,May his soul rest in peace.Just could not leave this page without writing a comment. Yes, AFTER AWHILE , brought me here.
Hope you would very soon realize that your friend is still with you in all the memories that you have stored in your heart. I know it is easy to say, but I want you to feel better.
Take care Stranger
Autre

Immortal said...
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Immortal said...

The bond of friendship once forged, never breaks. You may be apart, times or ages or worlds, but still close at hearts, and we feel it. You'll remember him and smile one day. I wept for my bestest friend last week. Until then I thought I was ok with what happened, but I came to know I wasn't. After I had expressed my self, in the language the heart speaks the best, I felt much better and knew he was listening, I know he watches my back.

Immortal said...
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Immortal said...
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Immortal said...
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Immortal said...
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